I am facing some sort of mid-life crisis at the moment. Which is weird, because I am 24 (25 in about 10 days). Maybe this is some sort of quarter-life crisis then?
For the past few weeks there has been so much I have wanted to do. Each weekend I put down all the things I want to accomplish by the end of the weekend, but usually don’t do any of the things I had planned to do. I make these plans for the weekend, because during the week, with my day job and college I am not able to do a lot of other things. But time and time again it appears that 48-hours in a weekend simply aren’t enough.
I probably have to go out less… And I will do so…. Right after my 25th birthday next week.
About that…
OMG, I am turning 25 next Friday. That’s a quarter of a century!! *freaks out*
Maybe that’s the reason why I am feeling weird these days. I went to bed last night with a “what the hell am I doing with my life”-thought. I have been feeling restless for the past few days and I am unable to explain it and unsure what exactly is causing all of this. For example I am seriously tired of all the schoolwork I have. Especially when I think about the very uninspiring way the entire organization is. Also I have been getting bored of my job. Do I want a new one? Or do I simple want something else to do? Do I want to be a web developer, or a desk employee for the rest of my life? In an earlier blog post I have already mentioned that this is probably not what I will be doing for the rest of my life. But what exactly do I want to do?
I think I need a long break from everything to think and figure out my life’s purpose. Last week I met an American guy who moved here to Suriname. He was basically facing the exact same problem(?) as I am facing right now. He couldn’t handle it, got bored of his own life, so decided to sell all of his things and bought a one-way ticket to South-America. Maybe I should do the same. Just sell all my stuff – what stuff? – and simply move. It’s no secret that I want to move and settle down somewhere far away… probably in Europe… most likely Holland. I just need a change of scenery. Or maybe I should just be patient and wait until I finish my IT-study next year (hopefully) and after that take a break from it all. I need new inspiration I guess… or a new distraction in life.
Today I have been trying to break the cycle of my life. I woke up this morning at 5.00am and arrived at work at exactly 7.00am; this is something that I haven’t done in almost a year. I am teaching myself to wake up earlier again, so I have a few extra hours in a day and hopefully will be able to work on a new routine and accomplish a lot more in one day.
