Clay's Personal

  • Clay's Personal The Naked Truth

    Drunk in love

    By Clayton

    The other day a newly-made friend asked me why I am still single.
    Each time I get this question – which is all freaking the time – I answer by saying:
    “If I knew the answer to that question I probably wouldn’t be single”.

    However I suddenly had an epiphany today. Apparently I am only liked when there is vodka, rum or weed involved. Yes, that’s when I am “romantically” attractive to others.

    Yes, I admit, I like my glass of wine before a date (feel to interpret that word as broadly as you want), but for me it’s more a courage thing. But yup, I think that is the answer.

    Where did this sudden epiphany come from? There I was sitting at a social event across someone I have seen naked on two occasions… I was wondering: why are there no sparks flying this time? Well, probably because we were both completely sober.

    Another example is the case of my two-year-secret-not-so-secret crush. Open the bottle of vodka, pour us a few glasses, get the music just right and we will be making out on the dance floor before the break of dawn.

    The other day I was looking at our pics and I was asking myself: why the hell are we not dating?
    It’s probably way more complicated than that, but maybe because we both can’t be perpetually drunk, which is why this will never happen.

    So…. Yeah…. I am mostly drunk in love, but I don’t see any sober love happening any time soon.

    DISCLAIMER: I don’t smoke weed, nor have I ever… but certain people around me do.

  • Clay's Personal Nerd Herd

    My new eyes

    By Clayton

    First thing I did when I arrived in Holland was order contact lenses. You may or not remember an old blog post from 2014 where I stated that I did some research on Lasik eye surgery or contact lens implants. Both were advised not to do so, as they would not work for me. However they did advise me to try hybrid contact lenses. Hybrid contact lenses are a blend between hard contact lenses and soft contact lenses. Since I have very bad eyes I can’t (or couldn’t) get soft contact lenses when I first tried contacts back in 2004. I got subscribed hard lenses and I simply never could get used to them.

    After I booked my trip to Holland for this year I went on Google and searched for places in Holland where I could purchase them. I eventually mailed a supplier of these special contact lenses here in Holland and they referred me to an optician, as they do not deliver directly to customers.

    The day after I arrived I had my appointment. The supplier of the contacts also came with his kit full of contacts. Together with the optician they checked my eyes and finally decided upon the best solution. Not a cheap one, but I wanted them.

    These contacts are custom made in the US and would arrive within 1-2 weeks from the day they were ordered. Well they actually arrived 4 weeks later on the very last day in Holland.


  • Clay's Personal

    A little less sober 29th Birthday

    By Clayton

    So that was my 29th birthday…. One more year and I am officially old.
    Again, my birthday was very mild, but fun. Unlike last year, I was not sober. 😀

    The day started off with me picking up this amazing cake, which I had been planning for week now. It was baked by a friend / former classmate, whom also had baked a cake for my niece’s first birthday last December. It was her idea to add my signature to the cake, which was printed on edible paper. The cake was a lot larger than I had imagined, but that was good, because I had enough for everyone to get a piece and it was DELICIOUS!!!

    At work we ate about 1/4th of the cake, I bought lunch for everyone at one of our famous Chinese restaurants and from my colleagues I received a bottle of Sambuca. I haven’t bought this in a very long time, but I have had many interesting nights from Sambuca.

    Once I was home I needed to sleep before I could receive guests. Not that I really invited anyone, but everyone is always welcome. The thing is, the night before I barely slept. I was dead tired from the busy day I had before that, was late up, because someone was about to pick something up at my place, but as soon as he left, I took a shower and went to bed at 12.30 am. Hoping I would have a very nice rest on my birthday.


    I was wide awake as soon as my head touched the pillow.
    I was still exhausted, but I couldn’t sleep. Nothing is more frustrating and annoying than being exhausted and unable to sleep. It also stormed that night. The wind blew so hard that it can be considered a real storm.

    When I woke up, I felt even more exhausted than rested. After I showered, I picked up the cake and went to work. Luckily it was a very slow day, so I could take it easy. I also took a pill to ease up my headache. Or maybe I am just getting too old.

    As I already said, when I got home from work, I just wanted to sleep. My older brother and his family came over, but I excused myself for an hour. After my nap, I felt a bit better.

    Over the course of the evening more guests (family and close friend) came and we ate and drank… lots of red wine. Which is why I had a massive hangover this morning, but that felt GREAT, because I haven’t had a real hangover in a very long time. So not a crazy wild birthday, but still a nice one.

  • Clay's Personal

    29th Birthday Eve

    By Clayton

    It’s the eve of my 29th birthday and I am here sitting alone in my room, drinking a glass of Smirnoff Ice, listening to Lana Del Rey’s album Born to Die and writing this blog obviously. There is a scented candle burning in front of me… there is no real reason for that. It just smells good and I like that. There also is no purpose for this blog post yet. I decided to just write and let the words write themselves.

    I just finished wrapping 2 gifts. No not for myself. I’m not THAT lonely.
    But wait… it’s almost your birthday… shouldn’t YOU be getting gift is probably what you are thinking.
    Yes, you are correct, but I just like to spoil others, so I have decided to give gifts to 2 people. Both spontaneous, both for various reasons.

    Carmen just started playing… I love this song.

    Oops, sorry, got distracted. Still have no idea what this blog is about.

    I do not feel like reflecting on my life right now. Feels a bit like a waste.
    Not my life… the reflecting at the moment. I think I am about to finish this glass and go watch some YouTube videos until I fall asleep.

    Good night world!

  • Clay's Personal

    Happy New Year 2017

    By Clayton

    2016 has ended and it’s time for my annual summary of the past year.
    I guess we can all more or less agree upon the fact that 2016 kinda sucked A LOT, but we are all hoping for a much better 2017.

    I don’t know about you, but 2017 is already treating me well. For starters I am working hard on completing my thesis. I want to graduate in February so there is no more time for procrastination and other bullshit. Let’s get this ball rolling and race towards the end.

    The other day I had also won the lottery 😀 yay. It was SRD 12, which equals 1.5 USD/EUROS, but I never win anything and I usually do not take part in lotteries. I believe in making your own luck in life.
    I bought this one while I was in the tank station shop two weeks ago and forgot about it until I was in there again. It may be just be a small amount, but it’s just the idea that luck may be on my side and I hope it stays with me for the rest of the year.

    But back to 2016. As already mentioned it kinda sucked.

    I did have a highlight, which was the Eurotrip I went on. Visited 11 countries within 4 weeks with my friends. I still need to write blog posts about that. I will do so over the course of next month when it will be one year later.

    The lowlight of 2016 was that I lost my best friend. No, none died! Things just fell apart and all efforts of me to salvage that friendship were avail. There is no real reason for it, I guess maybe the 18 plus years of friendship suddenly wasn’t meaningful anymore. That or we have just grown up. I don’t know, but I admit that this has depressed me a lot. Maybe I haven’t shown it or said anything, but on the inside it did. And it still does. But I have somehow accepted this and keep myself occupied with my work.

    In 2016 I have also worked my ass off way more than I ever have before. I admit the money came rolling in, but that also meant little to no sleeping. So it’s a 50-50 thing. I still have 2 freelance jobs to finish from last year. I want to do that, but after that take a break from freelancing. I am exhausting and need to find a way to balance it all out with my regular day job (which is also very hectic) and also find a way to sleep more. I am getting older and it all goes downhill from here.

    The love department as usual is lacking. In 2016 there was someone that finally made me feel the sensation of “butterflies in the stomach” again. I haven’t had this feeling since 2013, since… you know.
    I guess it has been a one year small crush that kinda blossomed into a bigger one in rapid pace, but having said that, this also went nowhere nor will it. I am stuck in the friendzone and I have decided to step back. It’s not gonna happen. Best is to retreat fast.

    So the beginning of 2016 was great (the Eurotrip) after that very crappy months and finally a great ending again when Farid and Patrick whom were both in Suriname on vacation. That was a nice few days, with little sleep, but new memories. Also some broken or fading friendships were mended.

    So for 2017 I have decided, no more BS, get that diploma and just steer of to a better future.

  • Clay's Personal

    Sober Birthday

    By Clayton


    Yesterday was my 28th birthday… 2 more years, before I turn the big three oh…
    Yay, for getting old! *insert sarcastic emoji here*

    I had a very subtle… read boring…. Okay really read, sober… birthday.
    This was the first in 4 years.
    Probably, because it was a Monday, and also my friends are either on vacation or have moved away.

    The only “celebratory” thing I had yesterday, was a cake for my colleagues, which I didn’t even by myself. Other than that, it was a normal work day for me. My older brother did come over and I was received a new bracelet, which I looooove! 😀 Thank you.

    Also thanks to those that wished me a happy birthday on my various social media account, or those whom texted and called.

    I think I will actually have a real birthday celebration when I’m 30… either that or I will be crying in my bathroom with a bottle of red wine, regretting half of my life… lol. Joking.


  • Clay's Personal

    2015 in a nutshell

    By Clayton

    I have no idea who pressed the “fast forward” button on life, but it needs to be put back to normal NOW!! Time is flying by way too fast for my brain to even process what is going on around me. 2015 has flown by and even now that we have entered 2016 it already is mid-January. What the fudge?

    Below I will share some memorable moments of 2015.

    In the beginning of the year the crazy roller coaster ride of work started. Completed my first project at work successfully and there were many more to come.
    After the first project was live there was a long period of problem solving, specializing and giving support, until I basically knew the software with my eyes closed.
    Shortly afterwards followed a more projects and basically filled my entire year fill of non-stop working. Not complaining though. I like what I do 🙂

    In February, a few days after my 27th birthday, I finally started working out. With the help of a personal trainer I have been able to keep this up to this day and the results are showing. I am nowhere where I want to be yet – think Andrew Christian model – but I am very proud of what I have achieved thus far and will continue to do so, because guess what? I have actually started to like working out.

    IMG_20150216_211726 IMG_20150226_191048 (more…)

  • Clay's Personal

    Drone Attacks

    By Clayton


    After having worked for approximately 14 hours a day for almost 2 weeks straight, I felt the need for a well-deserved drink on Saturday. I texted Dominique if she wanted to join me after I had gotten home and watched an episode of American Horror Story. A little after 11.00pm I picked her up and we drove to the city center. Since all stores were closed already and we wanted to buy a few things we were heading to the busiest tank station in Paramaribo – if you live here, you’ll probably know which one I am talking about.

    There was some sort of street party going on in the center of city’s night life and the streets were quite jammed. I had to drive very slow-paced and noticed a drone flying nearby. As I was almost underneath the drone, Doki looked up at the drone and said: “Look at that drone… I hope it falls!”

    3 seconds later….



  • Clay's Personal

    T-shirts and socks

    By Clayton

    2015-07-29 07.03.50-1

    That awesome moment when the theme and the color of your socks match that of your shirt 🙁 and the fact that this is the highlight of my day is sad part 🙁

    Yes, this is what my life has come down to. No business class flights to Amsterdam this year, nor Epica concert tickets, nor going out each and every weekend… times have changed.

    Okay, I did go out a couple of times the last 2 weeks, but that was mostly because of birthday parties and my best friend moving away, but other than that I have come down to a quiet, simple life… Yes, you can say boring.

    It’s not really a bad thing though. I have other priorities now (read: I’m getting old), I want to finish my college, I try to work out more and I am swamped with loads of work. So it’s not like I am not doing anything. But for now, the best thing to happen to me all day is the realization that I am wearing matching socks. Yay, joy! *sarcasm*